Into new waters

Into new waters

I sat in my tiny little room, gazing down at the floor and my twin brother sat on the bed opposite to mine. Today was a day I had longed for in my life, and also a day I  feared the most. I was filled with mixed emotions. Though this was what I had dreamed for in my life, now I really don't want to go. I don't want to miss and lose my dear brother, whom I've known for all these eight years of my short life.

As long as I can remember, I have been with my brother within the walls of this orphanage, and under the guidance of Mother Elizabeth - a nun who was in charge of this parish orphanage. During this brief life of eight years, my brother Tom is the only blood relation I had, and the only family member I knew. We attended the school run by our church, which was within the same premises of our orphanage. Mother Elizabeth is like a mother to us, and she has taken good care of us and has given us lot of love and hope. All our friends (fellow inmates in our orphanage) have always been very affectionate and friendly with us. Many a times we had asked mother Elizabeth, why our biological parents had abandoned us, but she had always tried to brush us off, and has given us hope that we'll soon get new parents and would be put up in a foster home. For us, we feel that parents are a blessing, and those who have a good family, affectionate and caring parents, are really blessed by the Almighty.

Many kids in the orphanage had been adopted, and a new foster home with an affectionate father and a caring mother was a dream which we have always longed to be fulfilled. When many of our friends were adopted by families, we too had great hopes for the day in which we too can be part of a family.

Finally the day I longed for came. But to my greatest shock & horror, the family can adopt only one child, and I have to leave my twin brother back here in this orphanage !!!

Though mother Elizabeth, and my "new mom" have assured me that I can meet my brother once in every two weeks, and also whenever I feel like meeting him, but still I have a deep pain in my heart for having to miss him. I fear I may lose him completely. If my new foster family shift to some other city, or after my adoption, if my brother is also adopted by another family which takes him away to a different place then I lose contact with him completely. I may even lose him completely!!!

I kept on staring at the floor. Today was the day I'll be adopted to my new family, and now I really don't wanna go. My brother had assured me several times that it's perfectly fine, and for good that I had been chosen by the family, and must move on to my new life without looking back, or thinking of him. He seems to be stronger & more optimistic than I, and has given me lot of hope. In life we can never gain anything without losing something. But still my heart is heavy, and very much pained as I have to part ways with my dear brother.

Suddenly, I heard an abrupt knock on the door and a chill went up my spine. My heart sank, and I looked up in horror. My brother gave a short grin. I gently got up from my bed and walked towards the door, and with trembling hands turned the door knob. It was mother Elizabeth. She extended her hands towards me and said with a smile "Come on honey. They have come and are waiting for you down in my office room".

I turned around, with eyes swelling with tears, and when I saw the smile on my brother's face as he sat on the bed swaying his legs, tears started rolling down my cheeks. I felt like running towards him and hug him, and cry together, but he smiled and waved his hand, and gestured me to go forward. I turned towards mother and as I walked out of my room, holding mother's hands, I heard the door shut behind me with a loud thud, and I felt as if my whole world was shut off from me. I walked gently ahead holding mother's soft hands, with tears rolling down my cheeks, and crying out loudly within my heart, but at the same time trying to put up a smile as I have to greet my new family.

I walked along the corridor of the building towards a new life, an unknown destiny, with hopes & dreams and also with pain & regrets, into new waters.

Penned down by,
Suveen Jacob Abraham.